Love is wanting to take her out to eat, but knowing you can’t afford it, and offering to cook, instead.
Love is opening your heart instead of your wallet when it would be easier just to spend money.
Love is when you know that you could get into bed with her just by being shallow, and insisting on getting to know her first—even if that means losing the opportunity, forever.
Love is seeking a “yes”, rather than avoiding a “no”, and being happy with whichever you get.
Love is knowing when to say yes, and being patient until then.
Love is seeing that the lawn hasn’t been mowed, but thanking him for doing the laundry, instead of complaining about the yard.
Love is when you say a kind word when an insult might be more appropriate.
Love is swallowing your pride and saying you’re sorry.
Love is writing something sweet on a post-it every morning before work, even when you’re mad at each other.
Love is giving your partner the last piece of chocolate.
Love is giving someone a massage when your own back hurts.
Love is cooking food that you can’t or won’t eat, because you know he likes it.
Love is eating “burnt offerings” with a smile, and then asking for seconds.
Love is abandoning a closely-held belief because it hurts someone you care about.
Love is choosing to support your partner’s eccentric ideology, even if it doesn’t entirely make sense.
Love is being unafraid to discuss religion, politics, or anything else—and always being willing to change your mind when a good point is made.
Love is choosing dialectic over of debate.
Love is when you give without caring whether you will receive.
Love is when you work a job you hate, so you’ll both have a place to come home to.
Love is dancing badly to terrible music, and enjoying it anyway, because it was your partner’s turn to choose the night’s activity.
Love is observing “date night” no matter how busy you both are.
Love is sitting through an embarrassing class or lecture so that you’ll know how to please her.
Love is learning to be satisfied, whether he figures it out or not.
Love is knowing when to hold her close, knowing when to give her space, and realizing that you need to ask, because you don’t have a clue.
Love is answering him patiently even if you think he should know better; and sometimes, love is admitting that you don’t have a clue what you want, either, and deciding to be OK with not getting it.
Love is accepting the love that is given, even when you don’t speak the other person’s language.
Love is learning the language of your partner, and giving him what he wants, rather than what you want.
Love is realizing that whatever love is, it’s definitely not what’s in movies and popular novels.
Love is reading those novels with her, anyway, no matter how silly you think they are.
Love is sitting through all seven seasons of Gilmore Girls, even though neither of you can keep up with the subtitles, and she keeps pausing it every few seconds so you can read them.
Love is making it worth his while to keep watching.
Love is setting reasonable but firm boundaries and sticking to them.
Love is respecting each other’s boundaries.
Love is accepting the sovereignty of another person, while also accepting the sovereignty of yourself.
Love is offering olive branches until the whole orchard dies.
Love is forgiveness.
Love is wishing she would quit smoking because you want to be with her a little longer,
But still watching the sunset through a cloud of burning ash, because that’s how you can be here with her, now.
Love is the act of changing the bed pan of someone who doesn’t look like the person you married, and realizing that the good times are still happening.
Love is almost dying of a broken heart after the funeral service,
But deciding to keep going because you know that she would want you too.
Love is the blue sky, and the trees, and the fresh flowers over your new bed.
Love is smiling at a stranger as you plant some fresh flowers on the grave of your ancestor.
March 2nd, 2014